Brevity

  I find it fitting that the approximate size of our heart is equal to the size of our fists.  Immeasurable is the actual depth yet I’m convinced there are limitless possibilities there.   Of more certainty is the brevity for which you can sustain certain emotions within said heart.  The metaphor isn’t lost on me when it comes to my heart being the size of my fist for my fists represent the fighting end of my spirit.  There’s a correlation there between that space.  At the end of our hearts, there’s the will to fight.  Buried within us there’s an indomitable spirit to fight to maintain what lies within that fist-sized muscle.  There is a truth and innocence in finding the spirit to remain open to the tsunami of emotions that our hearts can emit.  Like a new dawn melting away the frost, we can allow our emotions to flow freely and unencumbered.  We can dig deep and fight for what we feel inside, unapologetically and without fear.  We honor ourselves when we acknowledge and freely feel what others try and stuff down.  There’s poetry in reaching deep and letting what lies within flow freely as opposed to damning the rushing waves.  Giving yourself space and permission to feel those emotions can allow you to fight one more round for what you want, believe, or believe.

  We are, each of us, beautiful in so many ways and when you feel stifled, beaten down, unappreciated, or like you simply aren’t enough, you really only need to turn inward to find the light and passion that lies deep within.  Learning to tap into something beyond the basal level of emotions is a journey that can be wayward, scary, ridiculous, but ultimately it’s an awakening.  You have the right to feel whatever it is you are feeling.  You have the right to share it but you have an absolute duty to honor it.  While those you love can give you space and freedom to open up on such a level, only you can find the courage to do so before the brevity of the situation is lost in the next wave of emotion.  Travel lightly, speak your truth, and eventually, you will find a virtual tap has been opened allowing you to express, love, share, and feel in ways you likely didn’t think possible.  Ball up those fists (figuratively) and swing for the fences.  Face your fears and step into a cleansing synergy where love meets reality.  Be brave, love kindly, hope, and open yourself to the idea of accepting your own feelings. 

  It’s taken me 43 years and many hard fought battles, painful lessons, and tears beyond description to finally allow myself to feel THAT deeply.  I cannot imagine bottling up those deep and beautiful feelings that reside in the deepest recesses of my heart and soul ever again.  Therein lies a freedom that I will ever embrace.  While what lies there may not be received, it matters little as long as you honor, allow, feel and release those things and in turn receive the knowledge that comes with releasing something so terrifying (to some)…something so difficult to feel, much less share.  Do not stand by or stuff down what is in your heart.  Speak your truth and set yourself free!  You don’t “feel too much”…not for the right person/people.  Feel it, release it, love it, embrace it, and accept it and I promise you will feel a deeper sense of worth!

  So open the flood gates, roll with the punches, fight for love and honor, and when the reservoir has become empty…dance in the silence and embrace the emptiness for it is nothing more than a clean slate and a chance to start over.  Give yourself permission to refill that space with the beautiful feelings you already possess.